Timing is Everything

My doctor has me stretching the offending area, and when I go into my appointments he uses cervix dilators.  They are terrifying! 

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Cervix dialators look like weapons.  It’s as simple as that.

This has been going on for months, and my doctor assures me that I am and have been drastically improving.  However, my mind is overwhelmed with how much longer I have to wait.  It feels like it starts out as a manageable time frame until my mind begins to overwork the thought into a devastatingly long time-table.

However:

Ecclesiates 3:1-11
There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:
a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.
What do workers gain from their toil?  I have seen the burden God has laid on the human race.  He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.

God’s timing for our lives is just as important as His will for our lives. I think this song says it really well for those of us who are still waiting:

Lyrics: While I'm Waiting
by John Waller

I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait

I will move ahead, bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience
While I'm waiting
I will serve You
While I'm waiting
I will worship
While I'm waiting
I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait

I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait

I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve you while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting on You, Lord

P.S. I would love some feedback.  What do you all think of the cartoon additions?

Not Your Typical Monday Posting (that's why its on Sunday)

I am house-sitting for my mother-in-law, which means that I am not in my normal writing atmosphere.  For you, that means reading won’t remotely compare to the rest of my material, because my brain is functioning in a haze (also, with two wailing cats and a dog that likes to sleep with his face on the keyboard (the puppy is mine (I also have a cat but he’s home))) and I don’t know what to write.

When I don’t know what to write, this is the path my brain travels:

Blog...I should write something  0_0

Maybe if I procrastinate something will happen

Blog...I should write something, what was the sermon about this morning? 0_0 (God being unchanging and keeping His promises, but I wrote about that 2 weeks ago.)

INTERNET a.k.a http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/  (super funny btw, as a vulvodynia sufferer check out A Better Pain Scale , its mega funny)  =D

Blog...I should write something 0_0

Why?  >:(

I am benefiting from writing, but is anyone actually benefiting from reading?

Does it sound impersonal, like I’m on a soap-box?

(On a side note, my husband walked in just now, and sarcastically said, “Wow, looks like you’re making progress.”)

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Well, that was therapeutic! I’ll be in my normal writing environment next week, until then have a painless or less painful week.  


P.S. Most of this post was done while on Xanax, I apologize.

Just an update

My sister's surgery went well.  She, as expected, is in a ton of pain though, due to the neck muscles spasming.   Unfortunately it seems they are having some difficulty finding the right mixture of meds, to keep pain down without causing nausea, and also without her breathing going low.  However, we do expect her home Fri night.  Thanks for y'alls prayers.

On a separate note, I would like this blog to be a place where people can be comforted and encouraged by the Lord in their condition, not a place for me to complain about what hasn't worked. 

However, I know there was one question earlier as to the different things I've tried and  I am perfectly comfortable sharing that information over e-mail.  So if anyone would like to talk about those things, prayer requests or anything for that matter, please feel free to e-mail me at Veronica.P.Coleman@gmail.com, or you can facebook me at Veronica Coleman (mine is the picture with a black cat)

Learning to Let Go

The Story:
My baby sister, Gianna, was adopted from China several years ago.  Unfortunately, with so many little ones to care for and very few nannies, many of these children grew up under-developed and, in my sister’s case, lacking the knowledge on how to eat food.  Don’t get me wrong, they fed the children, just not well. They were fed something called congee, and if you don’t know what congee is, let me enlighten you...it’s disgusting, mushy, slimy, runny, suck it through a bottle nipple, boiled down rice.

So, when we adopted my baby sister, one of the first things we did was introduce her to good American food...or the best American food you can find in China: McDonalds.  And let me tell you, she loved the french fries.  With the little dexterity she had, she held them tightly within her fist and proceeded to mash the fry ends that protruded on either side of her fist into her mouth.  Imagine the first caveman attempting to eat a carrot. The problem was, a good portion of fry was still under her tightly curled fingers, and that’s where she got stuck.  Gianna couldn’t figure out how to get in under her own fingers to the last morsel of McDonald’s goodness, and worse yet, she wouldn’t let us help her.  That french fry was hers and no one was going to touch it.



The Lesson:
This memory always makes me laugh, but it is a lesson.  How many things (like my sex life, or lack of one) am I holding in my fist, trying to protect them from the One who could fix them?
The thought is, “Somehow God is going to mess this up.”  “He’s going to make sure I don’t get what I want.”  “If I let God take care of it, He’s going to ask me to give up everything, I ever wanted.”

But the Bible tells us differently:

 Luke 11:11-12  

“Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead?  Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion?


Mathew 7:11
If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!

God is good and His gifts are good; therefore His presence in our plans, our processes, and our lives is good.  We were created to love and glorify God forever; therefore when we aren’t in harmony with the Lord nothing in our life will be good or at peace. Our desires should be His desires, because His desires are good.


Romans 8:5-6
Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace.


When we want outside of God’s desires, our lives are reduced to fighting for something we were never really intended to have, or at least have “that” way.  If we let God build our life (or sex life) the way He has designed it for us, only then can we truly live.


Matthew 16:25
For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it.



On a completely different non-blogish note:
My 17yr old sister is undergoing surgery tomorrow morning.  An MRI showed that her brain has herniated out of her skull and is causing pressure on her spinal cord, the cause of her 3 month long migraine.  The purpose of the surgery is to remove a piece of her skull in order to make room for the enlarged brain tissue.  If you would please pray for her and her surgeon I would be most grateful.

God, are You listening?

Often times, I wonder if God is listening.   Does He know what I’m dealing with?  It goes without saying that He does, but it’s still an interesting thought.

James 5:16b
The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.

Matthew 18:20
For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.

Philippians 4:6
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

About four and half years ago, when I was leaving my classes, another student at my school that I had never met asked if she and I could ride the metro together.  This would not have seemed odd, except I had never met her, nor did we share any classes together.  I am not completely sure why I said yes, but I did.  While we were riding, she told me that God wanted her to tell me that I would meet and be with my life mate very soon. She said my mother and I should pray that God would show me who it was.  She and I parted ways, myself very confused, but I prayed anyway.  A week later, my pastor approached my mom, and let her know that he had been thinking about it, Jesse would be a great match for me.  A week after that, Jesse’s ex-girlfriend, whom I was and still am very good friends with, informed me that Jesse and I would be perfect for one another.  I was officially weirded out, but not convinced.

About three weeks later, the metro girl (as she became nick-named, since I had not yet gotten her name) asked to ride our train home again.  She asked me how my man-hunt was going and I told her what had happened, but finished with “I don’t really know...”.  She, Jasmine (I had finally asked her name), said the pastor’s words were a confirmation and that I was not praying the right way.

My question had always been, “God, are you listening?”, who would have thought that the question would be, “Am I listening for an answer?”

After this conversation, my prayer life changed drastically.  I prayed again, but this time I was expecting God to answer; I was waiting to hear and follow His lead.  Jesse and I started dating, and now we have been married for over a year, going strong.   

Romans 8:26-27
In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. 27 And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.

I don’t always know how I should pray, and sometimes I forget to listen for an answer.  However, the Lord always hears us and will answer us according to His will.  
Is your prayer life a one-sided conversation, or are you listening?

New Year's Resolutions

Happy New Years!

In my job as a salon assistant, where I enjoy the opportunity to interact with many different people, my conversations with clients are often dictated by the seasons. As you might guess, my question of the moment is, “Did you make any New Year’s resolutions?”

Yes, that time of the year has come...New Years, the time to renew your image, reach new goals, and commit to bettering yourself; your resolutions.

Of the majority, most people I spoke to said they would not be making New Year’s resolutions.  Most said that it was too much of a hassle and the new behavior was only good for about a week or two.  Last year my boss commented that he hated going to the gym in January because all the New Year crazies were starting their temporary work out mindset...February was a much better time to go.

About how many people actually were faithful with the new found promise to achieve goals?  According to a quick Wikipedia (NYResolutions) search, out of the 52% who chose to attempt their new ambition, only 12% actually attained their aspirations.

I thought of the different goals and standards I set throughout the year (not just at New Years)...the biggest one being “I WILL have sex with my husband by his birthday”, “by our first anniversary”... “this will be the year”.  Each time, I have found myself disappointed.  How was it that even promises I made to myself and for myself, I couldn't keep.  You are probably asking why I am being such a downer on our ability to follow through.

Deut 7:9
Know therefore that the LORD your God is God; He is the faithful God, keeping His covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love Him and keep His commandments.

Daniel 9:4
I prayed to the LORD my God and confessed and said, "Alas, O Lord, the great and awesome God, who keeps His covenant and lovingkindness for those who love Him and keep His commandments,

The Lord brought His people out of Egypt, He gave them their promised land, He promised the Messiah, Jesus Christ, His son, the man who was promised that he would not die till he saw Jesus as a baby; the Bible is full of examples of the Lord’s faithfulness and promises kept.

Proverbs 3:5,6
Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding;
 In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.

Romans 8:28
And we know that all things  work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

Philippians 4:6,7
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Expect God to keep His promises in your life, and you will see a new type of New Year’s transformation.